Fake friendships

From the beginning, I’ve always hated you
Before you spoke to me, I envied you
I smiled and wanted to get to know you
From our first outing, I was jealous of you
You tell me you love me, I say I love you but I hate you
You tell me your secrets and problems, I tell you it’s all gonna get better but I pray they stay with you
I’ve lied to you
In my mind, I’m killing you
I want to take everything that’s good about you
I wanna hurt you
I love going out with you but in my mind I can’t stand you.
In the end I realize I just want to be you